I was beyond exhausted—the kind of tired that makes you question if you’ve brushed your teeth or remembered to feed the dog.
Ever since the twins were born, my days had blurred into a never-ending cycle of diaper changes, feeding schedules, and sleepless nights. The last thing I needed was another problem to deal with. But when I stepped outside that morning, I found my car completely covered in eggs.
At first, I thought it was a random prank. Who wouldn’t? Halloween was around the corner, and maybe some kids had gotten a little too excited. I sighed, too tired to even be upset, and grabbed a sponge and bucket, ready to clean up the mess.
But just as I started scrubbing, my neighbor Brad came strutting over with that smug grin of his.
“That was me,” he said, almost proudly. “Your car was ruining the view of my Halloween decorations.”
I blinked at him, trying to process his words through the fog of exhaustion. My car? Ruining his view? His ridiculous display of plastic skeletons, fake cobwebs, and oversized pumpkins?
Furious, but too tired to even start an argument, I just nodded, biting back the urge to say something I might regret. I didn’t have the energy for a confrontation, but in that moment, I silently promised myself that I’d find a way to teach Brad a lesson.
He had no idea who he was messing with.
Don’t get me wrong, Lily and Lucas were my sweet little babies, but taking care of two newborns mostly by myself was incredibly hard. I hadn’t slept a full night in months. Halloween was coming, and the whole neighborhood was excited—except me.
I didn’t have the energy to decorate, let alone get into the festive spirit.
Then, there was Brad.
Brad took Halloween way too seriously. Every year, he turned his house into a huge haunted attraction with gravestones, skeletons, big jack-o’-lanterns, and more.
He loved the attention and would smile proudly whenever someone complimented his decorations.
The entire block loved it, but I was too exhausted to care about Brad’s haunted house.
One October morning, things started to fall apart.
I went outside, carrying Lily on one hip and holding Lucas in my arm, when I noticed something. My car was covered in eggs! The eggshells were stuck to the gooey mess, dripping down the windshield like some gross breakfast gone wrong.
“Are you serious?” I muttered, staring at the mess.
The night before, I had parked in front of Brad’s house. I didn’t have much choice since it was easier to park closer to my door with the twins’ stroller.
At first, I thought it was a prank. But when I saw egg splatters near Brad’s porch, I knew it had to be him.
Brad had done this.
Even though he didn’t own the street, Brad acted like he controlled the curb during Halloween.
Furious, I marched over to his house and knocked on the door, maybe harder than I should have, but I didn’t care anymore.
“What?” Brad opened the door with his usual smug expression, crossing his arms.
His house was already decorated. There were cobwebs, plastic skeletons, and a witch sitting on a chair. It was all too much.
I wasted no time. “Did you see who egged my car?”
Without blinking, Brad replied, “I did it. Your car was blocking the view of my decorations.”
I stared at him in disbelief. “You egged my car because it was parked in front of your house? You didn’t ask me to move it—you just trashed it?”
He shrugged like it was no big deal. “How can people see my display if your car is in the way?”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “Are you serious?”
Brad nodded, still looking pleased with himself. “I’m the Halloween King. People come from all over to see my decorations. You’re always parked there. It’s inconsiderate and ruins the vibe.”
I was juggling two newborns, barely holding it together, and he was talking about ruining the vibe?
“Well, sorry if my life interferes with your spooky setup,” I snapped. “I’ve got newborn twins, Brad.”
“I know,” he said, leaning against the doorframe. “Maybe park somewhere else.”
“I park there because it’s easier with the babies and the stroller!”
Brad shrugged again. “Not my problem. You can park there after Halloween.”
I stood there, speechless, my anger boiling inside. But being so tired, I couldn’t even argue anymore.
“Fine,” I snapped, and stormed back inside, shaking with anger and disbelief.
As I washed the egg off my car, something clicked. Brad wasn’t just an annoying neighbor—he was a bully. And I had had enough. If he wanted to play dirty, fine. I could play smarter.
Later that night, while rocking Lily to sleep, an idea hit me. Brad’s weakness was his pride. He needed his haunted house to be the best. I didn’t have the energy for a fight, but revenge? That, I could handle.
The next day, I casually strolled over to Brad’s yard while he was adding more decorations.
“Hey, Brad,” I said, faking cheerfulness. “I’ve been thinking. It was inconsiderate of me to block your display. Have you thought about upgrading it?”
He looked suspicious. “Upgrade?”
“Yeah, with things like fog machines or ghost projectors. Your setup is great, but those would really impress people.”
His eyes lit up. I knew I had him.
I suggested brands I had researched—terrible machines with awful reviews. But he didn’t need to know that.
“You think so?” he asked, already planning his next move.
“Oh, definitely. You’d be the talk of the neighborhood.”
Satisfied, I walked away, waiting for Halloween.
When Halloween night came, Brad’s house looked like a scene from a horror movie. He had gone all out, as I expected.
Crowds gathered to admire his setup, and Brad was in the middle of it, enjoying the attention.
I watched from my porch, feeling like a villain in a movie. His display looked impressive—until it didn’t.
Right on cue, the fog machine sputtered and started spraying water like a garden hose. The crowd gasped, and kids laughed.
Brad rushed to fix it, but then his ghost projector malfunctioned. Instead of a spooky ghost, it showed a strange blob, making the kids laugh even more.
Then, one of his giant inflatables collapsed, rolling across the yard. Some teenagers, seeing the disaster, threw eggs at his house for fun.
Brad was frantic, running around trying to save his haunted house, but it was too late. His Halloween display had turned into a joke.
The next morning, just as I was feeding Lucas, there was a knock at the door. Brad stood there, looking defeated.
“I, uh, wanted to apologize,” he mumbled. “I overreacted.”
I crossed my arms, waiting. “Yeah, you did.”
He shifted uncomfortably. “I didn’t realize how hard it must be with the twins. I’m sorry.”
I let him squirm for a bit. “Thanks for apologizing, Brad. I’m sure it won’t happen again.”
He nodded quickly. “It won’t.”
As he turned to leave, I couldn’t help but add, “Funny how things work out, huh?”
Brad had no response.
Look Closer… Vintage Photos That Were Never Edited
Few things are as satisfying as a trip down memory lane — and it’s even better when you find something you didn’t notice before. Because as Ferris Bueller said — life moves pretty fast. Here are dozens of pictures of celebrities and remarkable people of yesteryear in all their beautiful, vintage glory. The glamour, the fashions, the hair — whether classically elegant, effortlessly cool, or interestingly tacky, we shall not see their like again. Here’s to the movie stars who were larger than life, here’s to the rock stars who lived on the edge, here’s to the comedians who still make us smile, here’s to the bit players who had those moments of glory that changed their lives forever. It’s all good, it’s all groovy, and the rest is history.
Perhaps it was her Scandinavian free-spiritedness — Swedish-born actress and singer Ann-Margret seemed on call to be as sexy as necessary. Need an actress to smother Jack Nicholson with her cleavage? Ann-Margret would do it (in Carnal Knowledge, 1972). Need an actress to writhe in satin sheets and foam, then get sprayed by baked beans? Ann-Margret’s your girl (in Tommy, 1975). Need an actress to ride a large motorcycle in a thigh-high sweater dress and calf-high boots? Ann-Margret’s raring to go (in The Prophet, 1968). Need an actress who can shake her fringe top and miniskirt like a professional go-go dancer? Ann-Margret has that exact skill (in Appointment in Beirut, 1969). Need an actress you could cover in fluorescent paint and drag around a canvas like a human paintbrush while burly men in tribal garb howl and beat their bongos? That was so Ann-Margret’s thing (in The Swinger, 1966). Need an actress to wear a bra at a photo shoot on a chilly day? Not her thing, man.–Advertisment–
“Jungle Pam” Hardy, one of drag racing’s main attractions in the ’70s.
Jim Liberman was a drag racer who went by the nickname of “Jungle Jim.” He won a lot of races in the 1970s. Fans loved him for his flamboyant personality and masterful driving. But this is not a picture of Jungle Jim — this is “Jungle Pam” Hardy, Jim’s sidekick, who commanded attention at the track with her tight, skimpy outfits. She had a job to do, as Jim’s “backup girl,” she helped guide him as he drove his Chevy Vega backward on the track after a burnout. Pam joined Jim’s team in 1973, and in 1977 Jim died on an off-track car accident. Though she only did the job for four years, Jungle Pam remains the most iconic backup girl in drag racing history.
Burt Reynolds and Farrah Fawcett during filming of the 1981 comedy “The Cannonball Run.”
The 1981 road-racing comedy The Cannonball Run was packed with star power: Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr., Adrienne Barbeau, Mel Tillis, Terry Bradshaw, Dom DeLuise, Jackie Chan and 007 himself, Roger Moore. But you could have left all of them on the side of the road and powered to box office success with this supernaturally attractive pair of human beings: Burt Reynolds and Farrah Fawcett. He was the greatest heartthrob of the late ’70s; she had the decade’s hottest poster, and was the hottest lady detective on Charlie’s Angels, a show that was completely about conspicuously hot lady detectives. The chemistry in the movie (and this photo) wasn’t fake — Fawcett and Reynolds were romantically involved for a time.
Marcia, Marcia, Marcia! You’re gonna lose! Lose! Lose! A miffed Maureen McCormick on The Brady Bunch, 1972.
Be honest — which of these three sparklers from 1983 would you have pegged to be the future governor of Minnesota? History tells us it was Jesse “the Body” Ventura (at right), and not Randy “Macho Man” Savage or the lovely Elizabeth “Miss Elizabeth” Hulette. Randy and Elizabeth would marry the following year, and she would later debut in the WWF as Macho Man’s mysterious, glamorous manager. Sadly, neither Macho Man nor Elizabeth are with us today. Ventura, who served one term as governor and has since remained a popular political figure, occasionally floats the idea of a bid for the U.S. presidency. That seems far-fetched, as American voters would never make a crass TV blowhard the leader of the free world.
Cindy Morgan as ‘Lacey Underall’ in a scene from the comedy film “Caddyshack,” 1980.
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