Navigating changes in a relationship, particularly those related to physical appearance, can be a delicate and emotional journey. A Bright Side reader is having a hard time after his wife underwent plastic surgery. He shared a letter with us seeking our advice.
He shared his side of the story.
Here are some tips that we believe can help you.
- Reflect on Your Feelings: Take some time to reflect on your feelings and understand why the changes in your wife’s appearance are affecting you. Are your concerns purely aesthetic, or do they come from deeper emotional reasons? Understanding your own feelings will help you communicate more effectively with your wife.
- Communicate Honestly and Compassionately: Approach the topic with empathy and compassion. Let your wife know that you love her deeply and that your concerns come from a place of care. Use «I» statements to express your feelings without placing blame.
- Focus on Emotions, Not Criticism: Avoid criticizing your wife’s appearance directly. Instead, focus on expressing how the changes make you feel. For example, you might say, «I miss the unique features that made you who you are,» rather than, «You don’t look like yourself anymore.»
- Reassure Her of Your Love: Make sure your wife knows that your love for her goes beyond physical appearance. Reassure her that you’re committed to supporting her through any challenges she faces, including those related to self-image.
- Encourage Open Dialogue: Encourage open and honest communication between the two of you. Create a safe space where both of you feel comfortable expressing your thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment.
- Seek Professional Help If Needed: If you find it difficult to navigate these conversations on your own, consider seeking the help of a therapist or counselor. A professional can provide guidance and support as you work through your feelings together.
- Focus on Shared Activities: Spend quality time together engaging in activities that you both enjoy. Focus on building emotional intimacy and strengthening your bond as a couple.
- Support Her Self-Esteem: Encourage your wife to focus on aspects of herself that she feels confident about, aside from her appearance. Remind her of her strengths and accomplishments.
- Be Patient and Understanding: Remember that adjusting to changes in appearance can be a complex process, and it may take time for both of you to adapt. Be patient with each other and offer support along the way.
- Explore Ways to Reconnect: Find ways to reconnect as a couple and reignite the spark in your relationship. Whether it’s through shared hobbies, romantic gestures, or simply spending quality time together, prioritize nurturing your connection.
By approaching the situation with empathy, understanding, and open communication, you can navigate this challenging time with grace and compassion.
Couple gathers neighbors to repair elderly woman’s home, but wait till you see the result
Anne Glancey, an elderly woman from New Jersey, received three violations from the municipality because of the state of her house which was deteriorating.
Among the rest, there was an old car on her driveway which she needed to get rid of, or at least park it somewhere else. Further, she allowed her lawn and house to become overgrown and covered in peeling, chipping paint.
Sadly, due to her age and lack of finances, there wasn’t much this woman could do to renovate her place.
Luckily, Anne’s neighbors have been people with a heart of gold, especially a couple living near by who heard of this lady’s struggles from a real estate agent who was selling their home.
In an attempt to help Anne keep up with the repairs to her home, they gathered around 20 volunteers from the neighborhood and did the job themselves, and oh boy, what a difference they made.
“Anne was, and is, extremely grateful for our dedication to her property and her soul,” neighbour Kristin Polhemus, the initiator behind the project, said. “The project has inspired her to continue improving her home, inside and out, and it established new relationships between Anne and our neighbors.”
Source: Krisitin Polhemus
“These violations imposed a fine of no more than $1,000 per day, per violation. We knew we needed to help, as these fines would quickly surmount for anyone in Anne’s situation,” Polhemus said. “In life, we are called to love our neighbors as ourselves. We wanted to help her out of an act of love.”
Leave a Reply